Ask a room full of adults whether they have a will and most hands stay down. Ask why, and you'll hear the same few answers. "I don't really own anything." "I'm too young." "My family knows what I'd want."

The trouble is that when you die without a will, what your family knows you'd want mostly doesn't count. The law decides instead, using a fixed formula that was written for everyone and therefore fits nobody perfectly.

What happens if you don't have one

Almost every country has rules for what happens to the property of someone who dies without a valid will. Lawyers call this dying "intestate". The details vary a lot, but the rules usually work down a list of relatives in a set order: spouse, children, parents, siblings, and so on.

That sounds sensible until you look at who tends to fall through the gaps:

  • Unmarried partners. In many countries, a partner you've lived with for twenty years may inherit nothing automatically if you weren't legally married or in a registered partnership.
  • Stepchildren you raised but never formally adopted.
  • Close friends, godchildren and charities, who never feature in the formula.
  • A child who needs more help than their siblings. The formula doesn't know that.

It can also be slower and more expensive for the people you leave behind. Someone has to apply for the authority to deal with your affairs, and without a will naming that person, it may not be the person you'd have chosen.

It's not only about money

This is the part people underestimate. A will is often most important for things that have nothing to do with how much you own.

  • Guardians for your children. If you have children under 18, a will is usually where you say who you'd want to raise them if both parents died. Courts generally have the final say, but your wishes carry real weight.
  • Your executor. This is the person who sorts everything out: closing accounts, paying debts, handing over what's left. Choosing someone organised and trustworthy makes a big difference.
  • Pets. You can leave a pet, and money for its care, to someone who has agreed to look after it.
  • Personal things. A watch, a ring, a record collection. Small items cause surprisingly big family arguments.
  • Funeral wishes. These aren't always legally binding, but writing them down spares your family from guessing.
A grandmother braiding her granddaughter's hair
A will is as much about the people you love as the things you own.

Things your will may not control

Some of what you own may pass outside your will entirely, and it's worth knowing which before you rely on it.

  • Jointly owned property. Depending on how it's owned, a house or bank account held jointly may pass automatically to the surviving owner, whatever your will says.
  • Life insurance and pensions. These often go to whoever you named on the policy or scheme. If you named an ex-partner years ago and never changed it, that nomination may win.
  • Accounts with a named beneficiary, which some banks and investment platforms offer.
  • Assets in another country, which may be governed by that country's inheritance rules rather than your own.

So as well as writing a will, check the beneficiary details on your insurance, pension and bank accounts.

Can you leave your things to anyone you like?

Not always. Legal systems take very different views on this.

Some give you close to full freedom to leave your property to whoever you choose, although family members who depended on you may be able to ask a court for provision. Others reserve a fixed share for children or a spouse (sometimes called "forced heirship"), and you can only freely leave the rest. In some countries, religious law governs inheritance for some or all of the population. If you have family or property in more than one country, this gets complicated quickly, and it's well worth paying for advice.

What makes a will valid

Every legal system has its own formal requirements, and getting them wrong can make a will worthless. The common ones are:

  1. You're an adult (or have reached the age your law sets).
  2. You understand what you're doing: what you own, who might expect to inherit, and what the will says.
  3. You're making it freely, without pressure from anyone.
  4. It's in writing and signed by you.
  5. It's witnessed, often by two people who watch you sign.

Rules on witnesses catch a lot of people out. In many places, a witness (or their spouse) shouldn't be someone who inherits under the will; if they are, they may lose their gift. Some countries accept handwritten wills with no witnesses at all, while others don't recognise them. Some let you register a will officially; others don't have a register. This is exactly why local rules matter.

Mistakes people make

  • Asking a beneficiary to be a witness. See above.
  • Forgetting "the rest". Leaving specific items to people but not saying who gets everything else, known as the residue.
  • Vague wording, like "my savings to my nephews", when you have savings in three places and nephews on two sides of the family.
  • Never updating it. In some countries marriage cancels an existing will, and divorce can change how it works. New children, new property or a falling-out are all reasons to review it.
  • Hiding it so well no one can find it. Tell your executor where the original is kept.
  • Handwritten changes on the original. Crossing things out can create doubt about what you meant. Make a proper new will or a formal amendment instead.

Do it yourself or use a lawyer?

If your situation is simple (one country, no complicated family arrangements, nothing unusual to leave) a well-made will from a reputable template or online service can work. Follow the signing and witnessing instructions exactly.

Get professional help if any of these apply to you:

  • you have children from more than one relationship;
  • you own a business or property in more than one country;
  • you want to leave someone out who might expect to inherit;
  • you're caring for someone who will need long-term support;
  • your family is likely to argue.

Lawyers often charge a fixed fee for a straightforward will, and some charities run schemes that help people make a will for free or at low cost.

How to make a will this month

  1. List what you own and what you owe, roughly. It doesn't need to be exact.
  2. Decide who you'd like to inherit, and who gets "everything else".
  3. Choose an executor, and a backup, and ask them if they're willing.
  4. If you have young children, choose guardians and talk to them.
  5. Check the beneficiary names on your insurance, pension and bank accounts.
  6. Find out the signing and witnessing rules where you live, then make it properly.
  7. Store the original safely and tell your executor where it is.

None of that takes long. It's one of those jobs that feels heavy until you start, and then feels like a weight off once it's done. And the people who'll thank you for it most are the ones you'll never hear say so.

Photos via Wikimedia Commons: Writing with a fountain pen (Unsplash) by Aaron Burden (CC0); Grandmother and Grandchild by Sinchalak Musulmon (CC BY-SA 4.0).